Here I am. Back down again. I love it when a plan comes together.I managed to stay up for Sunday and Monday. Monday I met Rickie. That probably helped. But now she's on holiday until Saturday. I hope she has fun. More fun than I'm currently having, any way.
I don't know what it is. It just happened. Last night I started to get down, so I went to sleep. This morning I woke up fine. I wasn't overly happy, but I never am in the morning. I was just tired, as always. Then on the bus, just before Linh got on, I started on the downward slope. I survived through IT and thought I was starting to go up again. Then, halfway through my Period 3 spare...
And here I am. End of Period 3. Depressed, so I can write more to those who bother wasting their time reading about the problems of a depressed 17 year old, in most cases, they don't know and can't do anything to help. Even for those of you that do know me. What can you do to help? Not much, in most cases.
I don't even know why I'm down. I just am. And it feels like there's nothing I can do to get out of it. I hate when I get like this. It's not like I do it on purpose. It just happens. Last night it was triggered by something Linh sent me. I don't blame her. It was subconscious until I thought hard about it and remembered. But this one... It has no subconscious thought that it has pulled up and used against me.
I guess I could just be tired. I've fallen alseep in Revolutions for a few minutes at a time, attempting to keep up. It's just going over everything we went through yesterday for the people that missed it. I didn't miss anything.
But if it was because I was tired, why did it kick in when I felt most awake? I'm not sure any more. Always nice to know a good cake and some messing around with Linh can cheer me up. Sometimes it's hard to understand why I get down. Other times it's hard to tell if I've made any progress at all. It's just so confusing.
Hmm...
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Erebus
Pursue the Darkness
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